part 2 fertility journey

You can read part one of our journey here.

Okay, where was I? Oh yes. That phone call..

When we got word about Vince's sperm analysis we were faced with a difficult decision. Basically, our doctor explained that they would be referring us to a Reproductive Endocrinologist who would go over everything with us. Long story short, we would most definitely be needing extra assistance through either IUI or IVF.

It all hit me like a ton of bricks. I went through many highs and lows of thinking, 'okay, we can do this' and then 'okay, maybe we can adopt instead.' My mind was racing and was literally all over the place.

I didn't want to stress about it and most importantly, I didn't want Vince to stress about it. So we made a pack. We decided that we would take it easy, enjoy the rest of our summer and at the end of summer if I wasn't pregnant than we would go see the specialist.

We also decided to both go to Acupuncture once a week and see what that could do for us. If anything, we would zen out and have a happy, chill summer.

My acupuncturist, who also specializes in Chinese Herbal Medicine, put me on a supplement to be taken once a day during my fertile window. It tasted horrible and was such a pain in the arse but I stuck it out and drank it daily for three months. Vince was lucky though, and got to take capsules of some name I can't remember that were supposed to help his swimmers.

We stuck to it for the next three months and enjoyed the hell out of our summer! We went camping a few times, went on a vacation to the lake, drank a little and laughed a ton. We seriously had a blast and honestly, kind of forgot about the stress of trying to conceive.

Finally, the end of August rolled around and it was decision making time. We were still a few months shy of our one year mark, but with the news that Vince had Male Factor Infertility, we knew the process was going to be long and hard.

I remember, it was a Friday, and I was dialing the number to the Fertility Clinic and something triggered in my brain that hmmm, maybe I should just take a test and make sure I'm not pregnant. After months and months of pregnancy tests, and probably hundreds of dollars, I pretty much knew the drill on how to take them. Take it first thing in the morning when you wake up for the most accurate results. Well, it was already late in the afternoon so I missed my window. But I hung up the phone anyway and decided to wait til Monday to call the clinic. Plus, the next day was my sister-in-laws bachelorette party and I didn't want to be a total stress ball during that and wanted to have some fun.

Oh wait, I thought, tomorrow is Lindsey's bachelorette party! I need to know now if theres a chance I could be pregnant. Even though I was absolutely convinced that I was not and that there was pretty much not a shot in the dark that I could be, because of the test results, I decided to test anyway.

I dragged my feet up the stairs & popped open a brand new box of pregnancy tests and set it on the bathroom counter. I decided to fold some laundry while I waited the required 3 minutes, knowing that it was going to be another 'Not Pregnant.'

An hour passed and I realized I had completely forgotten to check it. I creeped into the bathroom to sneak a peak and low and behold.... 'Pregnant.'

Holy bananas! I took another test. And another. It was real! I mean, what! It was real. I could not believe my eyes. I was in absolute shock and even now the hairs on the back of my neck stick up just typing out this story. I cried and cried. Then waited impatiently for Vince to get home from the Academy and break the news. We just stared at each other, hugging, and crying, and laughing, and just so, so, so excited.

I will never, ever forget that day and how amazing we both felt after so many months of trying. I honestly can't say what did it, whether it was a mix of the Acupuncture, or the Chinese Herbal Medicine, or just relaxing and enjoying ourselves. But whatever it was, it worked. And nine months later we welcomed our sweet little boy, Truett James, to the world.

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It took a lot for me to share this story with you all. It is such a personal and emotional thing but I am so glad to finally let it out there. I know that our struggle is not uncommon and my hope in sharing is that more couples out there feel comfortable with talking about it as well. It's not something to be ashamed of or to hide behind but something to embrace and accept. I think that once we accepted what was happening we were able to move pass it and really focus on the bigger picture. I know how huge the struggle is and my hope in writing this is to let you all know that you aren't alone. I wish I would have shared this story with any one of my friends or family while we were going through it but I chose to keep it to myself instead and I think that only caused more pain for me. So, if you are reading this, and also struggling, please, please, feel free to send me an email and reach out. I would be more than happy to lend my support, because I know how much it is needed.

xo